Never Over It: Understanding a Mother's Loss

Some days we smile and remember the joy our children brought. Other days we ache in the quiet of their absence. We don’t move on from our children, we move forward carrying their love.

Never ask a grieving mother if she’s “over it yet.” Such a question can seem well-intentioned, but it carries with it a profound misunderstanding of her grief. She lost her child and will never fully recover from that. I know. I live it every day.

Every day brings its own challenges, and healing is not a straightforward path; it is marked by highs and lows, with moments of despair mingled with brief flashes of joy. The idea of "getting over it" implies an ending that simply does not exist. There are days when we allow ourselves to laugh, to experience joy again, and to remember the light our children brought into our lives. But in the quiet moments, when the world grows still, we cry. We allow ourselves to feel the depth of their absence, the weight of their memories, and the love that still lives within us.

The reminders are everywhere, photos capturing moments forever frozen in time, things that remain untouched, and the quiet spaces that echo with absence. There are days when the weight of sorrow feels unbearable, and other days when a smile might emerge, accompanied by a bittersweet nostalgia. We don’t move on from our children; we move forward carrying their love. Each step is guided by faith, trusting that God holds them in His eternal embrace, and that He carries us through the grief, the heartache, and the small moments of healing. Though their lives are no longer visible to us, their love continues to shape our hearts, our days, and the way we move in the world.

Be gentle with those who grieve. Their love lives on, and so does the hope that God’s grace sustains us through every step of the journey. Rather than rushing the healing process with questions that imply a timeline, offering a quiet presence, listening ear, and heartfelt prayers are more valued.

Prayer:

Lord, teach the world to be gentle with those who grieve. Hold our children in Your eternal embrace, and hold us when the weight feels too heavy. Give us grace for the days we are strong and mercy for the days we are not. Let love remain, let hope endure, and let Your presence be our comfort, today and always. Amen.